I’m noticing that, despite so much more going on around here, I’m starting to focus on my logs a lot less than I probably should.
I’ve just been spending so much time accompanying Sarah. I think I need to be honest and just say it. I’m emotionally and sexually attracted to her. I’ve never really felt this way, not to this extent. As one of the last children born on this ship, I’ve only really been capable of expressing love to so few people my age. Sure, I can genuinely say that I love Veronica and Flint. I would do anything for them. But I’ve never felt any real sexual feelings towards them.
Yes, I have had sexual thoughts about them, there’s no point in denying it, but I mean, come on, they’re some of the only faces I even know. Veronica is the only Kona female I’ve seen naked, so her body is the only basis I have for sexual self-exploration. And let’s face it. It’s hard to separate the face from the body.
But now, there’s Sarah. She has curves, breasts, a tail unlike any I’ve ever seen before… blood red eyes… teeth so big she can’t even close her mouth fully… ears that are big and round, but don’t flop around like ours…
I could probably keep going, but the bottom line is: I really, REALLY like her. Obviously she can’t help me continue our species, but that’s irrelevant. It’s not like there’s any better option here.
So, I think I’m going to try to establish a relationship with her. But I’ll try in a way less clinical way than how I just typed it. Ugh.