Sarah the Tika

Today, we let Sarah out of her quarters. After reviewing the evidence, I found a personal log that she recorded before she even met us. I still wasn’t sure as to whether or not she might have been pulling the fur over our eyes, until I came across this log, which she recorded a few weeks BEFORE we picked up the Canvas distress signal.

“They did it. They actually initiated the cull. They’ve killed at least six that I can prove, but who knows who else they’ve gotten to already. Apparently they’ll keep it up unless they can commandeer another ship. I don’t know if we’ll ever find one, but if they do, and they haven’t killed me yet, I have to find a way to warn them. If I can, hopefully they’ll let me seek asylum, since I’ll surely be killed for going against my own crew.”

When I opened the door, Sarah was curled up in a ball in the middle of her room. The reality of her situation had surely set in. There was a clear juxtaposition of emotions. Happiness that she managed to survive, and with her family intact, no less. Fear and concern from the fact that she is now a traitor to her own kind, who are surely in just as bad of a situation as they were before she left. And on top of that, her own sister bit her.

I explained to her that we had time to fully review her data pad, at which point she stood up, appearing teary-eyed but hopeful. I explained that I trusted her story and I felt no reason to see her as a threat to the security of this ship, but I was still concerned about Ginger, the other Tika. She quietly nodded, and immediately inquired as to Ginger’s well-being. I expressed that we were ensuring she was fed and comfortable, but she was otherwise refusing to communicate with us, even to acknowledge us when we placed food in her room. Her tray always wound up empty, so at least she was eating, but otherwise, we had no real dialogue with her so far, and until we could establish one, we couldn’t let her out. Sarah quietly nodded, understanding the situation.

I asked Sarah about the injury on her hand, at which point she held it up and showed me that it was healing really well. I could almost picture it being fully healed within a week, with frankly, was amazing, considering the severity of the bite.

Sarah requested that she may attempt to talk to her sister. I accepted this request, on the understanding that we would intervene if it led to more violence. I called Flint down to stay nearby, but out of view, and Sarah stood in front of the door, opening it only when I nodded.

“Can we talk?” is all she got out of her mouth before an aluminum food tray flew within inches of her head and smashed into wall opposite the hallway we were standing in. Ginger shouted at Sarah to ‘get the fuck out,’ at which point, Sarah stepped back, closed the door, and turned around. She was trying to hold herself together, so I… broke protocol. I opened my arms, saying, “It’s okay,” as she practically fell into my embrace, while openly crying, “what have I done?” I insisted that she could try again later, that Ginger would just need time to adjust to the situation, and that we’d make more attempts to talk to her.

I feel like I’m typing a lot more ‘he said’ ‘she said’ than I normally do in my logs. I don’t really invest myself emotionally as much as I have in this situation. This is just… different.

Anyway, Sarah returned to her room, and I explained to her how she can find her way to the bridge. I told her to come see me when she is ready. Flint and Veronica are both okay with her freedom to roam the ship freely, as long as she is restricted from access to some of the more sensitive areas, such as engineering, propulsion, stuff like that.

I know this is a personal log, but I’ve been rather impersonal, mostly describing facts as they happen. I don’t think this is relevant to a captain’s log, but I feel the need to write it somewhere. When Sarah accepted my embrace… it felt good. I haven’t hugged anyone like that in YEARS. I think I need to masturbate.

Captain O’Connor